If you read this stupid little blog of mine on the reg, you probably know how dumb I think the English language is. I tend to be more of a stickler about goofy grammar and syntax than most people, but I’m not always down on those errors (which may not necessarily be errors, technically). Sometimes they can be rather amusing.
For example, my incessant, insomniac internet excursions lead me to a site that was promoting “Michigan license restoration.” Upon reading just one little paragraph of the web page, it was obvious that they meant “drivers license,” but it made me think, “What if it was a license one needed in order to live in Michigan?” (I don’t sleep much. Stupid $#!t like that is pretty funny when you’re as tired as I usually am.)
Would kids in Michigan be allowed to be there only under their parents’ licenses? At sixteen, would they be issued a Michigan permit? Followed several months later by the nerve-wracking Michigan license test, of course. Pass said test, and you can keep living in Michigan; fail, and you’re shipped off to Ohio, Indiana, Wisconsin, or Canada. (Doesn’t matter which. Just get the hell outta the Wolverine State, pal.)
And, like a drivers license, there could be any number of infractions which could lead to someone losing his or her Michigan license. Buy your cherries from out of state? Forget your octopus at a Red Wings game? Just straight up hate lakes? BAM—license revoked!
The only solution, of course, is to track down someone who can administer your Michigan license restoration before you get glove-shoved down to Toledo.